Today is my birthday. I'm not huge on birthdays, never have been. I think that happens to most people, especially as we grow older, but having one in the dreary midst of winter always makes it more complicated to celebrate, if you do celebrate. Countless plans changed and parties cancelled due to snowstorms....yeah, it was a pain in the ass as a kid. Plus having both of your siblings' birthdays within two weeks of your own....further complications. Lots of sharing.
So thanks to Facebook and my own lack of "privacy", the whole world knows that I turned 38 today. Another year older....
Except it's really only in years. In maturity, I waver somewhere between my son's age (6) and early to mid high school (16). Fart jokes are still funny. I'm guessing they probably always will be.
I've spent a lot of time over the course of the past year working on who I am, how I feel about that person, and how to be better at being me. How to be better to those around me as well. And that's why I'm writing this now - not to ask for more birthday wishes or to garner center of attention status because I'm the birthday girl. I left my tiara at home.
I'm thankful. I have gratitude for a million things - at all times but today, seeing the outpouring of "happy birthday" messages has been overwhelming.
I know that Facebook tells you that it's my birthday - just like it does for everyone else who posts it. And I know we all have that moment of freedom where we can decide to wish someone a happy birthday or not. To those of you who decided to do so - thank you.
I'm grateful that I woke up on my birthday to my husband who inspires me and loves me no matter my faults every single day and to my son who wants nothing more than to sit on my lap and play video games with me. I'm grateful for the phone call from my mother this morning, when I got to listen to her sing Happy Birthday off key after only two sips of coffee. I'm grateful that I will get to listen to my grandmother do the same after I get home from work tonight. I'm grateful for my favorite coworker ever, Gloria, who makes me see the world a little different every day and who brought me flowers and a card (and cake pops) this morning.
I'm grateful for every message, text, phone call and post that I've received today. Some made me cry a little, some offered a chance to reconnect with people with whom I haven't spoken in a long time, some made me laugh, and all of them made me smile.
This birthday, I see the world from different eyes. I see it with hope and happiness and peace and perspective. I see what I have and what I cherish and what I want to keep.
I see promise.
And as it grows closer to the time to blow the candles out on this day, I don't think anyone could wish for much more than that.
